Sunday, 4 October 2015

102. How do we define success?



Mark 8:36 - What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?

It was reassuring last week when I went to the local pizza place and saw what I think as a typical Canadian disagreement.  The order of pizzas was not what the woman who ordered them was expecting.  In the ensuing conversation, the woman ordering apologized for not being clear enough in her order, and the woman at the counter apologized for not getting the order right.  After a bit of an exchange it was decided that the woman ordering the pizzas would keep the pizzas – even though they were not what she wanted – and the woman at the counter would give her a discount.  It was a win-win situation, but not for why you might think.
          I was pleased to see such an example.  Most of the time, I see errors in services being used as an excuse to act tactlessly and gracelessly.  There is an offense that the person taking the order did not get it right and that it is a personal slight.  As well, the person taking the order insists that the person ordering had made the mistake, and the requisite implication of the person ordering having a lower than normal intelligence.
          This might be a strange example to focus on, but it works for me in its simplicity.  I seem to be inundated with messages of how to be successful in the world.  It seems to me that we have become enamoured with the idea of “no one fucks with me.”  I see it every day.  It is now not only acceptable to be rude to people; it seems to be the preferred way of being.  I see it clearest when I am driving, and probably so do you.  Road rage is contagious and spreading.  It seems acceptable to not only cut someone off but to give them the finger while doing so.  Twice in the past week, I have almost been hit by people running red lights, who seemed somewhat angered that I was in their way.

So I ask you, how do we define success?

I think for a Christian it is an important question.  Not that I think that we should not be successful in materialistic ways, but that we consider really what is more important.  Like the two women at the pizza place, what seemed to be important was not the pizza, but the being decent human beings.
          So, I ask myself, and invite you to do so as well.  What is success in your life?  We are told that in putting the Kingdom of God first, that success will be ours.  But when I read the scripture, Matthew 6:33, it is not the greed that I see so often portrayed, it is the understanding that the pizza was not important, but the being decent was.  There will always be pizza to order, but perhaps not the opportunity to be a decent person.
          Yes, I can have the home that is perfect, and huge, and not yellow.  And I can have the truck and the car and the motorcycle.  As well, I can have the other toys that I seek.  But what does that benefit me if in the process I lose my soul?
          When I first read this scripture, I read into a view of God that if I did not behave that I would be punished, I would lose my soul.  These days, and maybe because it is closer to when I actually get to meet with him, I view the passage less punitively.  It is not that my soul is taken from me, but that in seeking success, in seeking the world, that I give up what is more important.
          For me, as I look at my life, my success lays less in material possessions, but lays in who I am.  My success lays in being a good husband, in being kind, and thoughtful, and supportive.  My success lays in being a good father, similar virtues as a husband.  My success lays in being a good employer, kind, and fair.  My success lays in being a good neighbour, generous with what God has given me, compassionate to those around me, and willing to be the one to work for change.
          In considering success, I think of 1 Corinthians 13; that if I do not have love, I have nothing.  I see the women at the pizza place having both won.  In their exchange not only was the world a better place, they had the joy of that exchange to last the evening.  An even further win, a week later my world is still a better place.

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