66. Their Names

Their names are:

Cheung Yuan Hong

George Chen

Weihan Wang

Katherine Cooper

Veronika Weiss

Christopher Michael-Martinez

Six young people who have lost their lives in Santa Barbara.  Two of the killer’s roommates and their friend were stabbed.  Three others were shot.  And the cause of this tragedy?  The killer could not get laid.

The news has been full of the events of last weekend in Santa Barbara, and it makes for good dramatic television.  The young man suffering from mental health issues, the parents were concerned about him and then finally the dramatic climax.  The parents, having watched the man’s You Tube posting, rush to Santa Barbara to get help for their son, but it was too late.  On the way to intervene, their son began killing, they knew from the radio reports.

We know his name, some of us will know his parent’s names, but very few know the victim’s names, if they are posted it is usually in the midst of an article.  But these six people lost their lives for no other purpose than the killer could not get laid.  I know that I am over-simplifying the dynamics, but the killer identified that women did not want to date him.

Underneath this I see a motive that is deeply troubling.  There is the assumption that women are made for men’s gratification.  I am a member of a faith that supports this belief.  The creation myth has that woman, Eve, was made so that man, Adam, would not be alone.  I believe the creation story in Genesis is a fable, an attempt to point to greater truths, not an accurate rendering of events.  Thus, in a male dominated society, a myth that the woman was made of the same material as the man, and made for his companionship, may have been a radical concept. 

Unfortunately, the attitude of women being made for the enjoyment of men persists.  I cannot help but believe such an attitude underpins the doctrine of complementarianism - the idea a woman's role is different and complementary to a man's role.  Sometimes it is more subtle than other times, but it is always there and always vulgar.  Recently a Christian celebrity was offered the opportunity to comment on the sinfulness of our culture.  He reduced it to the problem of homosexuality, and in doing so reduced women to being the simple possessors of vaginas; the preferred orifice for sex. 

There has been much ensuing conversation and coverage of this shooting.  There has been the focus of the drama of a family knowing that their son was mentally ill.  The last ditch attempt to help him, and avert this violence.  There has not been as much coverage of the people who have died.  There is a link at the bottom of this entry so that you may get to know somewhat who these people had been.

The coverage seems, at least to me, an attempt to put some distance between us and the killer.  I see it as an attempt to impose order on chaos, or reducing the aspect of chance in our lives.  I also see our hope that he is not like us, that he does not share our values and our ethics.  In other words I see an attempt to prove he does not reflect our attitudes.

“I know I would never do such as thing,” is the comfortable story that we tell ourselves.  It is true, most of us will not commit such an act.  But, do we participate?

I am not talking, actually writing, about directly assisting, or helping, but do we contribute to the attitudes and culture that encourages violence against women?  If that is too challenging a statement, consider that mothers still have the safety talks with their daughters.

“Do not go out at night alone.”

 “Keep the car doors locked when you are driving.”

 “Sit by the bus driver at night.”

 “Never leave your drink unattended.”

How do you contribute?  That is the question that I ask today, I ask mostly of myself, but if you’re reading this you might as well join in.  I hope and pray that my relationship to my wife is respectful enough that our kid gets the message that women are to be respected.  That violence, of any kind, is intolerable. 

As a Christian, do I really pay attention to the fact it was within a woman’s body that Christ was carried for nine months?  Am I mindful of the fact that it was women who came to care for his body when he was dead?  Or that when he was still alive women tended to him?  Am I mindful that it was a woman to whom he first appeared after the resurrection?

As a Christian, do I really, really, understand that I am part of the Bride of Christ?  A curious position, to consider myself as a part of a feminine collective. 

The challenge in this story is to see myself in the man who killed.  To see my commonality with him, so that I may be a better person – husband and father, a better example to those around me. 

For those of you who want to know more about the victims:

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/victims-of-santa-barbara-shooting-stabbing-spree-remembered/